Sunday, May 6, 2007


Sirianna is our daughter. At seven months old she's already off the scale, dwarfing even the largest of her peers, consuming vast quantities of banana and porridge, and smashing floorboards under her hulking mass. Here she is next to a "little" friend.

Sirianna is part wolf. This may account for her late night moon howls and hard-to-see-until-it's-too-late fangs. The wolf next to her is her sensei, teaching her all the intricacies of wolf-hood, as, clearly, her human side is the dominant side.

Sirianna's wolf side is more visible where food is concerned. Here she's caught devouring her prey, clearly unhappy about being exposed for the ravenous carnivore she is. Also seen here are her leftovers.

When you consider that she only has three teeth, the implications of her appetite become truly ominous.


Being a wolf with an appetite and a temper to match, Sirianna let herself get tempted by the bling, gettin' decked out in fine gold with matching diapers.

Here she is in her smooth ride, givin' the locals what for, showin' 'em what time it is.

But that's when she strayed from the wolf, who looked at her with sad eyes wondering how she could let herself slide so far from the pack.
Thinking back to the good times they had, suckin' on bones, hamming it up. Where did it all go wrong? Could he save her from the inevitable crash?


On an evening stroll in her hood like any other, Srianna caught something out of the corner of her eye, moving so fast she wasn't sure she'd seen anything at all.

The streak returned, this time in plain sight, apparently disintegrating squirrels as it moved over them. Then the streak seemed to notice Sirianna, swerved hard and made a bee-line right for her.

It was Mingus.

Nobody knows where Mingus comes from, but everyone agrees on what she is; a force of nature, neither good nor evil, but definitely trouble. For an impressionable young girl like Sirianna, that spelled an impossible to resist temptation. She got rowdy, out of control. The wolf was in too upset a state to help her at all. So we, her parents sent in her prince Marco.

The results were disastrous. Her new love of play coupled with wolfish territorial aggression put Marco in the hospital for 2 hours, and shock trauma therapy until this very day.

The tabloids of course heard all about it. Hounding Sirianna day and night, deliberately working her into a frenzy for their photo ops. We were at a loss.

Thankfully, a certain wolf had snapped himself out of his shock, ready with a plan.

Unfortunately for Sirianna, his plan was to wait for her time to be served. Wise old wolf that he was, he'd decided that this was the occasion to learn and practice patience and humility.

As the seasons changed, the wolf took solace in the cool weather and pure white snow, content in the knowledge that Sirianna, in the least, had a roof over her head, and, perhaps, time to think about the things she'd done and their consequences.

Somehow, the nobility of the wolf's inaction was lost on Sirianna, or as she was now called, Number 76. She bided her time and waited for the time when she'd again be with the wolf and Mingus.

Mingus, who surprised the wolf by extending a paw in friendship, terribly sad at the absence of her new friend Sirianna.

"I still don't get it" she'd say. "Christ. I mean we were only having a little fun."

And so the wolf and Mingus waited, together.

While Sirianna endured the humiliations of the mess hall.

And fear in the yard.

She passed her time as best she could, focussing on her mind by concentrating on her body.

But time passed slowly, especially as she couldn't see how she'd done anything wrong. And she missed the wolf, and Mingus.

And her mum. By god did she miss her mum.

But she refused to despair. She'd stay on track and see out the ordeal and come out the other side happier, smarter, stronger, faster.

And then...

A pardon.

Her loved ones rejoiced and prepared to welcome Sirianna, vindicated once and for all, home.

Sirianna, of course, was far less patient. She schemed and schemed and was told how long the paperwork would take...
Then she schemed some more.

"I must take matters into my own hands," she said. She busted out and snuck over to the airport, where she stowed away on the first flight she could.

"I wonder where I'm going," she wondered. "Oh I hope it's Paris. I do so love Paris."

She woke up after the plane had landed, looked out and her heart exploded with joy.

Paris! The Eiffel tower! Accordian music in the background.

She suddenly noticed the accordian music was followed by an electronic voice saying "win big!"

Well'', she thought, always wanted to go to Las Vegas too. Here I go!

Using her dazzling four-toothed smile and an air that said "of course I can pay for all this," she got herself a limo, and headed to her hotel suite.

It was work to get a car that fit her specifications, but they found one that was just the right colour and size, and had space for all the milk she could drink.

There was plenty more milk in the suite.

She spared no expense, shied away from not a singe luxury. The hotel staff found her a little wild, but the customer is always right.

She crossed the line with the showgirl.

The hotel tried to reason with her, but Sirianna felt there was still fun to have. So she kept racking up the milk bills and losing at craps and generally causing a ruckus.

She should have seen it coming.


On the trip back to prison, escorted by a bailiff, Sirianna had time to find a little perspective, and resolved to do her time and start with a fresh slate. She wasn't sure she could follow through on the promise, but she did know that she at least had it in her to try.

But she surprised everyone. Her time done, she went to the impounding yard to reclaim her ride. Her fuzzy dice were gone, but she felt she'd outgrown them anyway.

"I'm coming home mum."

She couldn't believe it when she said the words. It'd been so long since she'd snuggled in her mother's arms, smelt her warm scent. But soon she'd be back in the safest place in the world.

"I have something left to do, but I'll be back with you soon.I l`ove you mum. Tell the wolf and Mingus I love them too."

And she hung up.

What could she believe in, she wondered, if she could be so punished when, in her estimation, she'd done no wrong? Where do you go when your conscience is clean but you feel guilt anyway?

What went through her mind, confronting this austere haven, this place of warmth embedded in cold ancient stone? That's for her to know. What she shared with her mum and her wolf and her Mingus is that she rolled away stronger, surer...

Reenforced by a single friendly gesture that was full of good heart and genuine grace. The future was ahead of her and so was the path home.

She took a circuitous route home, journeying through the desert, purifying her heart and soul yet again, all the while anticipating the momentous reunion with her family.

Every vista and landscape, every grain of sand and lonely glance at the emptiness around her made her miss her family all the more, and gave her ever stronger resolve to do what was necessary to stay with them.

Luckily, they were closer than she suspected, her mum having divined where she was likely to go in such an emotional state.

She got her the hell out of the desert.

And back on the road! To more freedom! More adventure!!

Mingus on the other hand was wondering where in the name of christ she could be. Hadn't she got out of prison a while ago? Where could she be?

In a bar!

With her mum!

And a selection of charming gentlemen to choose from...

Making her giddy as a school-girl...

One after the other...

One twirl around the room after another...

Each more fun than the last...

But there was only one big guy for her...

Her big old dah! On one last twirl before heading home...

Home, to Mingus and her hair-losing stress...